#I’m still processing the finale
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moon wishes 🌕
#I love that the finale fell around the time of mid-autumn and the harvest moon#so that’s what inspired this#I’m still processing the finale#my art#fionna and cake#fionna and cake spoilers#adventure time#at#fionna campbell#cake the cat
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The way I rewatched this moment— you could just hear how angry and in pain Rio is here—
In the end Rio is hurting and lashing out, collecting Billy’s soul was just the cover up for how hurt she was.
Didn’t Kathryn Hahn say in an interview, that Agatha and Rio know each other so well and there is stuff that Rio is also hiding?!
#agatha all along#agatha harkness#rio vidal#agathario#agatha x rio#i’m still processing#this finale man
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wanted to talk a little bit about megumi’s character conclusion, since I’ve finished my JJK read.
tbh, I still have mixed feelings about the fact that he survived everything perfectly fine. that being said though, his conclusion doesn’t irritate me as much as nobara’s or yuji’s.
his incomplete domain is a bit disappointing, but it’s also not that important for a character like his, in my opinion, because becoming a top sorcerer never was his goal in the first place. in fact, it wasn’t rly his choice to become a sorcerer at all, he just didn’t have any other options and took the role upon himself for the sake of making the world a little bit safer for his sister.
also, if you take the scene of his very first domain expansion into account, it makes sense that he hasn’t got a full domain yet. to quote him, he can’t fully envision a future him without any limitations yet and he probably doesn’t have any idea what his future’s going to look like. that’s why an incomplete domain is fitting for him, until the day he figures out how to be completely free and learn to live for himself maybe. at the end of the day, he’s just a fifteen year old boy and doesn’t have to figure everything out immediately, especially not after such traumatizing events.
and that kind of brings me to the fact that he chose to live for the sake of another person (yuji) and not himself. controversial take maybe, but I think “learning to live for yourself” wouldnt be the right message for megumi’s character.
yes, he has always struggled with depression and suicidal tendencies, but it seems like the primary reason for this was not that he doesn’t see his own value or something, but rather that he had a general pessimistic stance towards the good in the world and how justice and “karma” work in it.
for him, tsumiki was one of the few good people left in this world, whom he on top of that owed a lot. but he’s also always believed that yuji shared her benevolence, so living for his sake this time isn’t that bothersome, because it feels like a realization that there’s still good things/people out there, that are worth living for - which is both a very fitting and meaningful conclusion for his character.
btw, I have to mention that I love how gege used sukuna to portray megumi’s inner demons here. very cool panel. 👌
#had this in my drafts for days bc I’m still processing the final arc lol#megumi fushiguro#jjk megumi#jujutsu kaisen#yuji itadori#fushiguro tsumiki#jjk#☁️.blogging
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It is fair to say that the season 2 finale is the 5 stages of grief, thematically woven in the best way possible right?
#iwtv spoilers#iwtv#amc iwtv#iwtv s2 spoilers#iwtv s2#interview with the vampire#iwtv season 2#iwtv s2 finale#I’m just out here processing with y’all#there’s so much to feel and think about still#claudia eparvier#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#daniel molloy#armand#the vampire armand#santiago#only an opinion btw#just posting to process
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2014 - realized I liked girls but began desperately trying to “pray the gay away”
2016 - stopped believing in Christianity as I began to better accept my sexuality
2020 - publicly came out as bisexual, and shortly after my gender crisis began
2021 - nonbinary ? we’ll run with it, I’m experimenting! I’m playing with it! I’ve been in college for a year so now I have the room to try some things out!
2023 - my first pride parade! and the gender crisis continues on…. I would really love more masculine features… a deeper voice is my dream… I see men with flat chests and I get so envious. maybe I’m trans?
2024 - FINALLY allowing myself to use multiple labels that feel right! nonbinary, transmasc, genderfluid, genderqueer, they all feel like ME! planning on starting HRT after I get married and get onto my fiancé’s health insurance. plan on getting married in a wedding dress because THAT’S WHAT I WANT! because gender is not a strict binary and I am allowed to play with it however I want! my gender is not for the pleasure or comfort of anyone else! I got to experience my SECOND pride finally feeling content with myself and my identity! I’m happy! I’m so happy :)
#the journey of finding yourself is a long process and honestly it never ends#I’ve been in the journey of self discovery for a decade now and I’m still learning something new about myself every day#but I finally feel like I know myself#I have a good community of understanding people#and you know what? tumblr really helped!#make fun of this hellsite all you want but the people on here are so helpful#getting reminders from a wide community of people that you don’t need to fit into strict labels#or you can use multiple labels!#or none at all!#just do whatever feels right to YOU#there is no wrong way to be queer!#I love you tumblr queers#even when I had my first blog in 2014 when I was 12 it felt nice to have a space that made me feel like I was gonna be okay#thank you tumblr queers#trans#lgbtq#ftm#trans man#transgender#transgender man#transmasc#trans pride#donnieisaprettyboy#ftm problems#genderfluid#genderqueer#nonbinary
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Not Alone
Hunter x Reader One-Shot
Warnings: Big spoilers for The Bad Batch S2 finale. Sadness, angst, comfort. SFW
Summary: You comfort Hunter after the events of the season 2 finale.
Word Count: 900ish
I was inspired by @jedipoodoo ‘s post on writing comfort for Hunter after the S2 finale, and @wanderer-six ‘s lovely Wrecker fic. Check it out! Our boys are in desperate need of comfort. 😩
Anyway, enjoy. 😌
The Marauder was deadly silent. You could feel the anguish hanging in the air, it was suffocating as you tried to conceal your sobs. You found a small corner of the ship to tuck away in to, trying to process everything that had happened.
Tech was gone.
And so was Omega.
You couldn’t think straight, the grief ripping through you. Watching Tech plummet in to the clouds ran through your mind over and over. Seeing Omega be taken, while you all watched hopelessly, gripped your heart like an iron vice.
You squeezed your eyes shut as tears spilled out, silent cries wracking your body.
A gentle touch on your shoulder startled you. Hunter was standing over you, his face twisted in guilt. You had been with Clone Force 99 long enough to call them all brothers. Over time, your relationship with Hunter became more than friends, and you loved one another fiercely.
On Pabu, in those blissful days of no worries, you both talked about settling down there together with Omega. You were hopeful for a chance of putting your lives as soldiers to rest, and being with the man you loved. But that dream was now gone.
He held out a hand, offering to help you stand up. Always the strong Sergeant. But he doesn’t have to be.
He shouldn’t be the one coming to comfort you, as you knew him well enough to know what he was thinking. He blames himself.
You took his hand and laced yours with his once you stood up fully. The feeling of his gloved hand caressing yours gave you solace, momentarily. He looked at you, the absolute pain his eyes making your heart shatter. “Hunter…” your voice almost inaudible. He reached toward you with his free hand, wiping a tear off your face. “We’ll find her…” he whispered. You bit the inside of your cheek, trying not to crack under his gentle touch. “Don’t blame yourself...” You mumbled as you laid your head in the crook of his neck, tears threatening to fall again. Hunter put his strong arms around you, pulling you close and resting his cheek on top of your head.
“Let me help you, let us help you.” You said softly.
He gripped you tighter, and you could feel his body shake. “It was my fault. I shouldn’t have let them take her. I shouldn’t have taken us to Cid’s. I shouldn’t have let Tech…” His voice broke and he buried his face in to your hair. His usual stoic demeanor was crumbling, and he felt lost.
Useless. A failure.
He had let everyone down. First Crosshair. Now Tech. And Omega…his family was fading away from him one by one and there was nothing he could do about it. His grief over Tech laying so heavy on him, he could barely breath. He had never felt so undone.
He continued his hold on you, afraid if he let go, you’d be taken from him too. Something that he already had nightmares about and couldn’t bear the pain of that passing thought, not now. His senses were suddenly overwhelmed, and his head began to spin. He stumbled forward, before catching himself on you. “Hunter! Sit down, you’re still injured...” You had grabbed his shoulders to catch him, and he leaned in to you.
“I’m still here, Hunter.” You murmured. “We made these decisions as a team. And Tech…he saved us. This isn’t something you need to carry alone. Please, we’ll do this together.” You pleaded, knowing whatever you said, he would still carry the guilt on his own. He knew he didn’t have to, but it was habit. He let out a breath, your soft words bringing him back, grounding him.
Hunter looked you in the eyes, trying to find anything to say. You placed a hand on his cheek, and he leaned in to your touch, feeling more vulnerable than he’d ever had in his life.
You brought your lips to his in a soft, chaste kiss. “I’m here for you. Always.” His mesmerizing brown eyes met yours, and you could see tears forming in the corners. “I know.” He whispered as he brought you back in to another strong embrace, your familiar scent surrounding him. He focused on the sound of your heartbeat, rhythmic and strong. Alive.
He felt your hands on his back, the warmth of your palms radiating through his clothing. He truly didn’t know what he would be without you, especially now, in this moment. You had a way of always knowing what he was thinking. While you were intense and composed on the battlefield, you had a tranquil way about you. Whenever Hunter was stressed by a mission, getting in to his own head about his skills as a leader, you were always there to reassure him. It’s one of the reasons he fell for you.
You melted in to one another, desperately wishing the circumstances were different. He slowly pulled away from you, because if didn’t, he would continue getting lost in you forever. But every second that passed, Omega got further away. You knew it too. Your lives as soldiers weren’t over. Not yet.
He put his hand under your chin, lifting it gently toward his face. “I love you.” He mumbled, pressing a tender kiss on your forehead, before stepping away from you. He moved toward the front of the ship, where Echo and Wrecker were silently sitting, lost in their own dark thoughts.
“I love you, too.” Your heart swelled momentarily, before following him to begin planning your next move, ready to continue the fight.
#uhhhh I didn’t mean to write angst#this kind of helped me process the finale? haha#oops my hand slipped and I wrote a Hunter fic again#I swear I’m still working on a crosshair fic I’m just having writers block on it#the bad batch fanfiction#hunter tbb x reader#Hunter tbb#hunter x fem!reader#the bad batch spoilers#the bad batch#the bad batch x reader#starrycatwrites#Hunter tbb x you#Hunter x you#sergeant hunter#clone force 99
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surprise art attack!!! here’s @deityofhearts ‘s cashmere, everyone’s favorite whimsical tiefling
#pose taken directly from the kikuomiku4 album cover bc i’ve been listening to UFO on repeat for idk how many days now#finally gave me the inspiration i needed to do something like this it’s like both sad and super whimsical#actually tbh it gives me more wishful vibes now that i think about it but 1. idk what wishful looks like and 2. cashmere design my beloved#kikuo just in general has a lot of whimsysad and/or fundark which is why i love him#tbh ufo has quickly shot up to one of my fave songs it’s the iconic accordion and the tempo being unstable in places#uh anyway ignore me being a kikuo nerd again#wahhh this was fun to work on it has consumed me these past three days#jumping up and down hehehehehe#glad i finally cut to the ‘it’s done *collapses*’ stage of the arting process bc i’ve been having trouble finishing pieces lately#man i WISH i could come up with poses this good on my own. idc i’m still proud of this#my art#ok yeah i just got the time total. 12 hours#i knew it would be a long time but i didn’t think that long#tbh a lot of that was spent inefficiently bc i kept having to resize the image up when i realized the pixels were too crunchy#and when you make an image bigger the lines get blurry so then you have to redo them. yeah i had to do that TWICE. like a dummy.#12 hours used to be like par for the course for me but i’ve finally gotten faster. or maybe i’ve just stopped doing as many full figures#lol
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Pros: for the first time in four incredibly long years, I have my interests back! I can hyper fixate on things again! I can’t believe I’m having my first hyper fixation in FOUR YEARS again!
Cons: why did it have to be monster hunter, a notoriously difficult series of video games, why am I making dinner at 2:30 am.
#moontalk#juno hours#personal#don’t get me wrong I’m so happy to finally have my ability to hyperfixate back#didn’t even realize that’s one of the things I lost bc of this person until I realized#I was hyper fixating on monhun#it’s crazy bc I’m still trying to piece through all the things I lost for four fucking years#getting all these pieces of myself back has been so cool actually#Ive become closer to my coworkers to the point that they’re also my friends now#which is super cool#and it’s been wild finally letting them into my life more and letting people get to know me bc#I’ve been getting to know myself in the process#the person I lost four years ago#I missed me#altho I do need to like not let my hyperfixation overtake my entire life LMFAO#sorry to everyone who’s been patiently listening to monster hunter yapping#I owe you my soul and I love you forever
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🙂↕️🙂↕️okay okay okay so so far within the og divisions we have:
❤️: they strive for a world where words solve conflict. they pointedly did not use mics to express this. at the end of the track, they’re dynamic as brothers has shifted to a more equal dynamic, where ichiro doesn’t feel so compelled to raise them
💙: they strive for a world without violence and used their mics to resolve the conflict. at the end of the track, they reject their status quo and aim to find a new one to change the world without the use of violence
💛: wanted to be real with each other and used their mics to get that across. at the end of the track tho, they say that truth doesn’t really matter anyway and stay true to the selves they formed their bond with
🩶: a battle of wills using the mics. jakurai’s love for yotsutsuji manifested in the form of sacrificing himself and dohifu trying to stop him using their love for their bond as mtr. at the end of the track it’s that love that’s saved jakurai, healed hifumi and elevated doppo’s status at work
and things have changed for all they’ve stayed the same so i’m genuinely curious where nagosaka fits in this lol
#vee queued to fill the void#as i’m typing this i haven’t really processed the scope of mtr’s story lmao#like it may be bc i’m still a matenhoe forever and always but holy shit their love literally changed their lives#and seeing those threads come to a head like that literally made me want to projectile vomit LOL CAN NEVER FEEL NORMAL ABOUT AN MTR DT EVER#i want to draw!!!!!! the scene where sensei as calm and as at peace as he’s ever been!!!!!!!!#tell dohifu they may think him using the true hypnosis mic to save yotsutsuji is stupidity but to him!!!!!!#it’s literally the most important thing!!!!!!!! god!!!!!!!!! it’s the utter peace in his voice that literally kills me listening it!!!!!#doppo: with all due respect this boils down to your ego#sensei: my ego? well that certainly may be the case. it is i who will be saved by doing this#me: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGHHHGG#*sniffs* god hypmic has been insane for these tracks on god pls tell me i’m not the only one who sees how insane hypmic rn#and like??????????? wtf can dh and bat deal with??????? i wish i was big brained to see where nagosaka has been going towards lol#dh has to be setting the tone tho since lowkey???? tdd are paralleling with their 1st drb match ups lol bbmtc want basically the same thing#and fpmtr reaffirmed their bonds and identities in theirs#and like ‘the trio’ makes me think rosasa are finally going to punch rei in the face for ditching them lol#but it might be time for dh to enter in the plot frfr trying to get rei from doing stuff on his own#so does bat parallel that??? trying to stop kuukou from doing things on his own???? something else?????#bc hitoya is deadass the only who has interacted with the plot in any way lmao (kuukou too as a victim of the true hypnosis mic)#this is me processing things out loud gomen thanks for attending the ted tag vomit lmao
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The last place I used to work, part of my job, alongside many other things, was watching a manager’s child. This kid was great and was only ever allowed very limited amounts of hippie-type candy, so she’d ask me (often) to describe whatever garbage thing I was cramming in my face between pulling orders. And she’d listen, little face half-closed in thought, as I described the taste of the candy or cookie or snack.
All that to say, @domes, who is on limited sugar intake, came back from the discount grocery and placed these in front of me, then looked at me expectantly.
#they’ve apparently BEEN there for a month#slowly reducing in price until finally falling low enough for them to dare me#I’m still processing the taste#meche chatters
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Finally got around drawing Aioros :D
#saint seiya#saint seiya fanart#los caballeros del zodiaco#sagittarius aiolos#I remember reading somewhere (either a post or some wiki page idk) how aioros is often revered as the perfect saint an almost divine figure#and I’m pretty sure aioros initially refutes being the next pope saying saga would be a better fit (it’s 4am so correct me if I’m wrong)#anyway I watched some of kotz for fun and saw that scene. he seemed rather upset at the news but a sense of distress I can’t really describ#even when keeping in mind that he was only 14 I don’t think it was the responsibility that comes with being a gold saint/pope successor#but more combining the first bit of being highly viewed. he seems like a rather humble guy who’s rather content with risking his life#or has at least excepted that fact. but when seem as more than a simple soldier it makes him uneasy. because he knows he’s not a god#yet is put in such position that when adding his sacrifice at an early age he’s practically legend. and despite the initial denial he will#always be obedient enough to accept the duty placed upon him. this is all to simply say I tried drawing him smiling but it didn’t look righ#so ye. (feel bad for just leaving the thought process to the sketch in the tags but it’s not my best wording so it stays down here)#a smol trivia nugget: I still don’t know how I want to draw aioros :p actually better trivia nugget: the pose/composition is from a photo m#they saw I had taken a photo but my angle was rather bland so they decided to absolutely blow me away with one heck of a photo#theres even nice lighting and everything. real glad I finally used the reference as reference :]
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my five surviving braincells when something remotely good happens:
#in other news… wORK IS OVER PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#man. i’m s o tired. i can’t believe i survived almost 2 whole years at this job…#huh. come to think of it… i started tling idol sengen before i even got this job lol. and i’m only 3/5 of the way through it…#can’t believe the idol sengen grind->hiatus->grind(?) outlives my time at [withheld] company…#i did end up spending a cool 20 mins cleaning out my work locker though. i found so many treasures i didn’t even know i had in there#like. there was an unopened 3-pack of wet tissues a n d an unopened box of pens that i don’t recall buying#and ofc the 3 random sponges i ‘liberated’ from the lab. don’t tell my boss lmao#w a i t now that i think about it i should’ve taken at least 1 vial of (allegedly) carcinogenic sand for the memories. dammit.#oh well. what’s done is done i suppose. i did receive way more chocolate than i could ever eat though…#y. yeah. i guess i’ll miss my coworkers (a little). they were fun to annoy every day. except for the new guy bc i don’t like him at all lol#i have never met someone who lacked as much common sense as he. i think he’s gonna get canned before he’s able to resign on his own terms#dude could be spoonfed through every single step of the testing process and *still* mess up somewhere smh#but no. this isn’t about him. even though he is the final straw that led to my decision to resign#hm. looking back on it now. i think i was pretty good at my job for the most part when it came to the things i could do#or maybe i was too good at it. like. to the point where even more experienced analysts were coming to me in search of help#prolly gonna miss being one of the very best (out of like a grand total of 10 people at the lab) at doing ftir-related tests#ehehehehehehe i wonder if that workstation will continue to stay as organised as it is now that i’m gone#a n d i wonder what my coworkers will do now that they can’t ask me for ms excel help for the smallest of things lol#sometimes i just wanna tell them to g o g o o g l e i t ! ! ! when they call me over for it. but alas.#can’t believe these guys know how to use c h a t g p t and not ms excel (despite having it on their resume) smh#omg wow this got long and incoherent sorry guys i think i need some sleep lol. idol sengen next week..#…maybe…? no promises though!!!!!
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we got three four-hour stretches! the midnight feed was challenging as he peed all over himself mid-diaper change and was utterly inconsolable about it for five solid minutes after 😂 however we all survived this harrowing experience and slept soundly afterwards. he’s doing a great job now of soothing himself back to sleep after a feed which was such a struggle in the early weeks. hm okay my parents are back in town tonight so most of my goals today are house chores.
the day:
fold and put away clean laundry x 1
fold and put away clean laundry x 2
take dirty laundry downstairs
showerrr and do a hair mask
pick up mail
fill out forms to mail
wash bottles
meal plan
place grocery order
change sheets
5 min tidy kitchen
5 min tidy living room
make formula
make enchiladas
grocery pickup
visit liz
walk dogs (stroller or carrier walk)
finish reading this very long fic?? or put a significant dent in it anyway
#daily processing#he is five weeks tomorrow#my goal was to make it to six weeks of pumping and then reassess#it’s hard because he’s finally learning how to latch#but I’m just not producing enough to justify triple feeding (pumping + bottle + bf’ing)#so I think I’ll keep pumping 3-4x/day until six weeks next Monday#and then I’ll go down to one morning pump and will continue to let him latch as he shows interest#but I suspect my supply will dry up fast since it’s so low already#that’s ok! I feel kinda sad about it still but#I don’t think it matters that much in the grand scheme of things
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i’m being put through the emotional wringer with this game, heavens
#ffxvi#i’m finally playing it#there have been like three plot twists#not plot twists but like hard right turns that all make sense but#they still rip my heart out in the process#ugh#ugh.#clive rosfield#torgal#spoilers#a character just died#not saying who because it’s not the first time i could have said that T-T#it applies broadly#why is this game so depressing#(she loves tragedies and is enjoying every moment of it)#ough.#why
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Finally getting a chance to return to tumblr and break this art block after the absolutely hectic last year I had. Gotta slowly catch up on everything I’ve missed on here. And of course already started on working on fgw.
#I hate that I’ve been gone for so long and had no chance to draw#last year I had to quit my job look for a new one#then when I finally got settled I had to start the progress of moving#which I’m still in the process of but fuck it
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i love my new therapist so much cause she’s the first person i’ve ever met who takes me seriously when i talk about suicide even though i don’t have a concrete plan and haven’t actually made any attempts yet
#with everyone else it’s like. hey i feel violently suicidal i started s*lf h*rming again and i feel so miserable im in physical pain#‘oh cool. well have you attempted suicide in the past?’#no. ‘well do you even have a plan for what you’d do?’#also no.#’okay well i don’t really care. have some more prescription medication that you continually threaten to od on’#’btw have you tried just not being depressed? maybe give that a shot. okay that will be one billion dollars see you next month’#but emily (that’s my new therapists name) actually listens to me#and acknowledges how scary and concerning being in my mindset is#and she walks me through what my options are for when it gets really bad#and i like that when i go quiet cause i don’t know what to say she doesn’t get frustrated with me for wasting time and she doesn’t#put words in my mouth and decide what i’m feeling for me#she asks what im thinking and gives me the space to process what i am thinking and if i can’t talk about it she tries to walk me through#the thought process and doesn’t push me. if i don’t wanna talk i don’t have to#basically. i like her a lot so far. and i still feel bad a lot#but having someone finally actually listen and take me seriously makes me feel a little better#she doesn’t just repeat ‘oh it’ll get better you’ll be fine’#she’s willing to stay in the present with me and figure out how i’m going to get through the next week instead of making me figure out my#whole life right now#sigh#snow.txt
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